Zach & Miri Make a Porno (Review)

Kevin Smith loves three things – profanity, schmaltzy love stories and a naked Jason Mews. It really shouldn’t surprise anyone that all three are on… er… display in his latest film Zach & Miri Make a Porno. (Using the actual title of the film thank you very much.)

The film gets off to a bit of a shaky start as Smith’s first act is just littered with unclever and over abundant uses of various expletives. Smith has a tendency to layer it on thick when he can’t find any pop culture references to riff on for 6 pages and this happens quite often here. The dialogue isn’t sharp but just as you start to get annoyed the leads arrive at their high school reunion and we meet Justin Long (playing a character named Brandon) doing his best Harvey Fierstein impression as a gay porn actor and beau of superman himself, Brandon Routh (playing a character named Long). And for the next hour or so this is a pretty good film. Smith keeps the plot on a steady pace, the jokes funny and the characters that matter developing. The addition of an Apatow alum cast (Long, Elizabeth Banks, Seth Rogen, Gerry Bednob, Craig Robinson) helps with the natural chemistry and the two porn actresses in the cast (Traci Lords & Katie Morgan) pull off their roles adequately. Then something strange happens – Smith goes meta. Or at least tries to. When the inevitable second act bottom-out happens the film jumps 3 months and Craig Robinson’s producer shows up to find Rogen so he can tell him that “the film has no ending.” Charlie Kaufman can pull this type of thing off without seeming hackneyed… Smith cannot, so for 3-4 scenes the film just falls flat on its face but once again the ultimate resolution is saved by the strong bond between the characters and the chemistry between the actors as Banks and Rogen get all sappy and live happily ever after – under cut of course by cursing and a naked Jason Mews… I don’t mean Mews was improperly sniped… I mean he may have been I just tried not to look… I mean I’m sure the doctors did a fine job on him as a baby… I should just stop talking.

B/B-

EZ1 Winter Game Starting Soon

The final season of the EZ1 boxoffice game for 2008 starts soon - follow the link to sign up and play. The winter game is run not by Eddie but by Jana and has several unique aspects including the presence of Limited Release titles and poetry based "hints" to each price change. Sign up at http://www.ez1productions.com/.

Eagle Eye (Review)

Wham, bam, thank you ma’am.

I just want to know what Jerry Bruckheimer did to piss Spielberg off so badly as to assure his virtual banishment from the action spectacular producers’ club? This is something that JB’s name would have been all over 3 years ago – hell, so was his boy Bay’s Transformers – but instead the Exec credit on both of these (as well as the last D.J. Caruso/Shia Labeouf pairing Disturbia) goes to Mr. Hollywood himself. And like the man about town this film is all oohs and ahhs with almost nothing left to say.

That said… those instinctual squeals of delight are totally real and totally worth it. The extravagance of the set pieces that aren’t edited beyond recognition are combined with an edge of your seat plot that is meticulously lifted piece by piece from so many better sources (visuals too) are tossed in an orgy of suspense and explosions that despite your mind saying no, your eyes give into again and again. The only thing worth singling out for any specific memory is Billy Bob Thornton’s performance as a counter terrorist agent as he is given all the sweetest lines in the film and wouldn’t you know it delivers ‘em with that silver-tongued glee we expect from a man in his uniform. The rest of the cast is a bland group of pretty faces, even when you know they’re capable of so much more (Rosario Dawson… hello!) but it works here because it’s not about them or their characters or their feelings. It’s about the sport of it all which the film has in spades. That is until the climactic (and literal) money shot. There’s some drivel that comes after when you realize the whole experience was meaningless and that now the film wants to cuddle a bit while you just need to kick it out of room.

Yes, Eagle Eye will leave you feeling dirty and ashamed but that’s not until after. While the ride is in progress there’s really nothing going on but the sheer enjoyment of the whole thing.

C+/B-

Choke (Review)

Let me get this out of the way first. Choke is my favorite Chuck Palahniuk novel. There was no way a rookie actor-turn-director was gonna take the material and do anything interesting with it the way Fincher did with Fight Club. The best I was hoping for was that it would be a serviceable adaptation that got the source material right without leaving too much of the dark comedy on the floor. Surprisingly Clark Gregg (also playing Lord High Charlie) went slightly beyond not ruining the film in heightening the emotional tone between both Victor Mancini (Sam Rockwell) and his mother (Anjelica Houston) and his (main) love interest (Kelly Macdonald). All three actors are strong in their roles but none more-so than Rockwell who ability to suck you in with his loser charm is once again in top form. Despite the stronger emotional bonds though, some of the frenzied sexual absurdism is lost in the adaptation, giving the film a much flatter tone than the novel. However I find that this works in a way similar to Garden State while not getting overly somber or maddeningly cutsey as that one did (BTW this was also filmed in a certain national armpit). Gregg allows the humor and wry titillation to undercut his dramatic moments just enough that the film never loses its steady pace or Palahniuk's cynical world view and leaves enough of the novel intact that those looking for an insider moment or two will feel all warm inside.

B

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist (Review)

Glamorous indie rock and roll, New York is thy name. This aspirational film for hipster kids everywhere paints a portrait of overly talented and highly connected high school kids with fake IDs running amuck in NYC over one shimmering night of comically tumultuous coming of age set to some of the finest music the kid down the street insists is the best thing ever (on his blog). Welcome to Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist.

Starting out in North Jersey (as all nights in Manhattan do) we are introduced to Norah – a brunette who seems indefinably uncomfortable in her private, single-sex school with a group of blonds who are nicely movie-plastic. She is in love with the desperate ex-boyfriend of classmate Tris whom she’s never met but knows only through a series of mixtapes that he has sent (and which Tris heartlessly trashes) over a six month period. This, of course is Nick, reluctant arbiter of taste and the straight bassist in a queer-core band struggling to come up with a name. Being in mourning still, he rebuffs his bandmate’s when they try to get him to come out for the evenings gig.

When an announcement is made on a radio station that the uber-cool and mysterious band Where’s Fluffy? (yes, their name is part of their gimmick) will be playing one of their infamous sets somewhere in the city that night though, everything swings into action for your typical night in the city romp as people meet, separate, lose cell phones, miscommunicate, get tired, get drunk, have sex, fall in love, get jealous, make mistakes and figure it all out before the first NJT train of the morning leaves Penn Station. Did I mention this is all set to the swirlingly warm tones of the most lauded indie tracks of the day?

The film really is a trainspotter’s dream. They name drop every lauded rock venue in two boroughs (cuz there is no need to ever go to Queens, The Bronx or SI) and the ever present soundtrack changes from minute to minute during the night that one has to be an astute trainspotter to keep up with it all. The story itself is rather conventional and Cera (Nick) shows once again that Apatow (who, for the record has nothing to do with this) is a genius at type casting but not so great at finding “actors.” Still when you fit the part you fit the part. The one person I’m happy to say has impressed me quite a bit in the performance department from said machine is Jay Baruchel who, after a strong turn in Tropic Thunder, takes on a seedy struggling musician in the mold of Julian Casablancas who is trying to use the other casting stand out, Kat Dennings’s (Charlie Bartlett, 40 Year Old Virgin) Norah, as a way to get a record deal for his Zion Fire Rock outfit. Also of note on the comic relief front are Norah’s bff Caroline played by Ari Graynor who provides the bulk of the B-story as she gets wasted and then gets lost by the super-gay bandmates Rafi Gavron (Breaking and Entering) and Aaron Yoo (21, The Wackness, Disturbia) who try to take her off Norah’s hands so that Nick can get the rebound started. (Yoo btw, is almost 30 and is still playing a kid in HS – take that Luke Perry).



While not earth shattering N&NIP is a nicely crafted piece of escapist fluff and if this is you kind of scene or, more likely if you’d like it to be Mr. Minnesota blogger, then I would say to rush out and see it like 8 times while you listen to the leaked soundtrack on your iPod. For everyone else – how do you feel about Before Sunrise light?

B/B+

Kings of Leon Leaked All Over My Internets

So uh... yeah Only By the Night seemed to pop up last night whilst scanning the 'sphere. I know, I couldn't believe it either! Rest assured the kids will begin rapidly sharing tracks post haste. The actual release date is 9/23 and the iTunes pre-order comes with a CSS remix of The Bucket which I'm anxious to hear.

They've been trotting out a few of the tracks on the road recently and I'm totally boutabout 'em.

Peep the first ever live performances of "Sex on Fire" & "Manhattan" from the APW fest last month.



(I'm completely in love with this one)

along with oldie "Milk"



They somehow shoehorned 20 tracks into their "opening" slot before Radiohead took the stage and sounded phenomenal. If the KoL swing by your town (and even if they don't) on the current tour pick up tickets - you won't be sorry.

Also props for making the first single free for all.

Kings of Leon - "Crawling"

(and to 12mc for still hosting)

And in case you need more they Kings are putting up a series of home movies via their YouTube Channel all month (well until the "actual" release date.)

late-

Hellboy II: The Golden Army (Review)

Congratulations Guillermo del Toro, you are the most frustrating filmmaker working today. I used to be able to write you off as an overrated and untalented filmmaker – no more. Hellboy II: The Golden Army is a technical marvel. This film is beautiful in a way that surpasses everything that del Toro had done to date… combined… including Pan! Unfortunately, like every film he has made, the story is flat, the pacing is poor and many of the emotional moments just seem to hit the wrong note.

The film opens with a flashback of John Hurt (killed off in the previous installment) telling an adolescent Hellboy a bedtime story about a war between Men and the creatures of myth (Goblins, Trolls, Elves, ect). The visuals that accompany this story are not of the same motif as the rest of the film but instead they are rather like a CG version of a Quay Brothers film with wooden figures and mechanical gears propelling armies toward each other. The story then jumps ahead to present day and Jeffery Tambor’s Tom Manning upset that Hellboy doesn’t listen to him. He is the cause of so many of these wrong notes in the film’s first hour. Also Abe Sapien is back but the voice of David Hyde Pierce is not – this is not a good thing. So the story unfolds though too many coincidences and there are some action scenes including one in Diagon Alley!! There are some great references to John Landis and Jim Henson and some overly overt ones to Universal creatures (Frank specifically). There is a love story that never feels right and a bunch of relationships that are fairly unbelievable. On the other hand the action scenes are nearly perfect as is one scene in the middle of the film where Hellboy and Abe break into song! The ancillary creatures are stunningly rendered (as the fantasy world of Pan was) and final battle is a seamless blend of CG and live action that isn’t edited to death.

I wanted to like this film, I really did, but del Toro once again fails to connect as a storyteller. Throughout the film he either coaxes the wrong notes out of his actors or edits the wrong takes into the film. It must be all that time spent in his own imagination that gets in the way of him getting the human aspect of his films right. Guillermo del Toro is an utterly hopeless filmmaker who needs to be kicked out of the director’s chair and restricted to a creature house so that we can all enjoy his visual tour de force stylistics without sitting through his failed attempts to hang them on his lackluster scripts. Feel free to leapfrog George Lucas on the way.

C/C+

Hancock (Review)

WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME NANCY GRACE MAKES AN APPEARANCE AS THE VILLAIN!!!

Ok, now that that’s out of the way… Shoehornin’ is the word I’d use to describe Hancock. Peter Berg’s film wants to critique the superhero genre while at the same time giving that big summer-blockbuster superhero-event widest-possible-audience feel. It wants to fit in an American allegory. It wants to have good actors actually acting instead of being superhero cutesy. It wants to play with our expectations but also possibly set up a new franchise. It wants to do all these things and pretty well succeeds in doing so.

This does not start out as an “origin story” film instead we are dropped right into a chase scene and our hero emerges and saves the day… well kinda. We find out pretty soon that there is little love for Hancock and that he has drinking and anger issues. Queue Jason Bateman. Bateman plays Ray, a struggling PR rep with a heart of gold (a movie first I believe) who wants to help Hancock in exchange for saving his life and despite some evil stares that his wife (Mary - Charlize Theron) gives when he first comes over for dinner. As Hancock’s latest incident had lead to an arrest warrant Ray sees a golden opportunity (PR 101) to get people on Hancock’s side. Of course the plan works as while he's voluntarily behind bars, the crime rate rises and a newly sober Hancock is called into action. THEN we get the twist and the intro of the origin story. All of this happens surprisingly fast – there’s very little downtime in this plot heavy film.

Berg grows in his journeyman director status with each films and this is no exception. The quick pacing, handheld camera work and high octane action that never get in the way of story or acting that was a hallmark of The Kingdom is taken up a notch here. There are some shaky transitions between acts and some bits that feel vaguely off but they more or less help to build to that twist.

Smith, Theron and Bateman all shine in their roles especially Theron who is the best female character I’ve seen in a superhero film ever. And as a superhero Hancock is unique. (Allegory in 3…2…1…) He is the only superpower in the world all his actions seem to lead to disaster for a lot of people even though his intentions are good and he does in fact save lives. He is alone, but unlike Supes, Hulk, ect he has no alter-ego in which to hide and commune with us regular folk. He just has to accept what he is, flaws and all and try to change what he can in order to make the world a better place. (Oh yeah his symbol and a repeating motif of the film is a bald eagle and his name is in fact John Hancock). The mythology of his creation is interesting but delivered in a pretty off hand matter leaving little to sink ones teeth into.

Hulk tried to go for emotion and failed miserably while Iron Man was content to forget all about that in favor of breezy charm. This one has an emotional side that is far better than that green thing but despite some huge laughs in the first 2 acts it’s not over the top charming. It is indeed a well rounded package and I hope word-of-mouth is far better than the critical reaction so far as this film deserves a big audience and a couple sequels to flesh out some of that Highlander style back story.

B+/A-

Wanted (Review)

Mrs. Pitt is really the only bankable action heroine in business these days. But you never really know what your gonna get when she shows up all guns blazin’. Surprisingly she has very little to say in this film compared to what the trailers would have you think. She is pretty much the shapely facilitator for James McAvoy’s rippled assassin… but not just yet.

The film opens with a helping of Matrix set up and a McAvoy voiceover telling us all about how much his life sucks stuck in his office job and how his dad left a week after he was born. This could be the guy we just witnessed get blown away after jumping through plate glass across the Chicago skyline and killing 4 assassins on the opposite building. This trite and badly staged intro is made more surreal due to the fact that this is the first time we’ve seen Mac putting on an American accent. In fact the whole first act of this film screams “set-up” and brings you out of the film. However, it becomes a little more worth it when Fox (Jolie) shows up and the bullets rain and rubber is burned. Even more so after Gibson (Mac) wakes up the next day with a attitude that actually feels believable (the whiney kid bit at the outset feels more like a role for Hayden Christiensen). One of the best scenes in the film occurs when he finally gets fed up at work and gives his tormentors their due. After which he is scooped up by Fox and his assassin’s training begins.

The Fraternity, (a little too on the nose) as they are called consist of a gunsmith named Gunsmith (Common), a knife guy, a healer and they're all lead by Morgan Freeman (Sloan, or Ra’s al Guhl). Gibson is told that his father (indeed the dead guy) was one of the worlds greatest killers and that he has inherited some of his “powers” that just need to be harvested in order to kill Cross – a rogue member who took out daddy and a lot of other frat boys. What follows is an extended montage wherein we are introduced to the world through our hero and he is broken down so that his skill level can be built up. We are also introduced to the great power the Fraternity believe in… 1000 thread count sheets!! They were started by weavers who discovered the secret of binary code in their weaves and thus decided they should kill people (Cross for some reason questioned this).

This all sounds completely ridiculous and it is. The comic the film was based on pretty much stole from a whole lot of other yarns (pun intended) and what wasn’t stolen is the least believable stuff but is all just a place to hang the action. And what fine action it is. Timur Bekmambetov brings a lot of his creative techniques that made the Night Watch films so great but tones it down just a bit and it really fits perfectly. The set pieces are expertly staged and never (ok once) feel like a Michael Bay looky-what-I-can-do moment. As the killing starts an the chance is joined our cardboard characters pursue Cross around the world but just when you think things are gonna go in a different direction the Empire Strikes Back leading up to the big finale with a V for Vendetta round the room bit and a lot of exploding rats (Willard maybe?)

Once Mac gets going he’s actually an ok action star though he might need a few more improving montages before he can take on Bale or Jackman. Freeman uses his persona to good effect here especially in the final act where he gets some big lines and even bigger laughs. Jolie as I said earlier had very little dialogue despite a large amount of onscreen time but they way she exudes confidence eliminates the need for words. This is a fun summer spectacular and as such the brain should be left in the Abby Normal jar on the shelf but as far as summer blockbusters go this bests all but Iron Man so far this year.

B

Get Smart (Review)

When updating classic TV shows there is usually a formula that is followed – short intro quickly placing characters in their respective rolls followed by the bulk of a ridiculous plot featuring where possible cameos from people associated with the original show. This film thankfully does not follow this formula. Instead Get Smart takes the Casino Royale (apropos) origin story and overlays it on one Maxwell Smart.

The film opens with a quick montage then its off to the Spy Museum in DC (again - nice touch) with Steve Carell carrying a stack of papers that is just slightly to large for him. We hear a tour guide mention that C.O.N.T.R.O.L. has been defunct since the end of the Cold War and then a smirk show’s up on Carell’s face as he enters the secret entrance. But Maxwell does not start out the film as an international super-spy. No, he is only a lowly analyst awaiting his Field Agent’s test results. Anne Hathaway’s Agent 99 isn’t even introduced for a half hour! After a leak exposes most of C.O.N.T.R.O.L.’s agents its up to rookie 86 (Smart) & a facially reconstructed 99 to take on K.A.O.S. and their attempt to get their hands on a stock pile of nuclear weapons… and fall in love along the way. Carell plays Smart somewhere between the unconfident Andy of 40YOV and Michael Scott’s bumbling never admit your wrong attitude on The Office. While this feels like a retread for the first ½ of the film, once he starts to become Agent 86 (about the time he first utters the famous line “Missed it by that much”) the film become an effortless piece of summer fun. They even take some time to lampoon Entrapment to hilarious results.

(Listen to the classic theme)

The acting is mostly top notch. Alan Arkin re-teams with his Little Miss Sunshine co-star and he is again great and the back office shenanigans between tech-geeks played by Masi Oka & Nate Torrence and sidelined field agents Terry Crews & David “Whammy” Koechner fill the b-story gaps nicely. The only disappointments in the cast are the bland Dwayne Johnson and the surprisingly uninteresting Terrence Stamp who seemed to be phoning in his role as Siegfried, head of K.A.O.S. There are also a boat load of cameos including James Caan (President), Geoffrey Pierson (Veep - demoted from 24), Kevin Nealon & Larry Miller (CIA), Patrick Warburton and Bill Romanowski (Air Marshall). Bernie Kopell – Siegfried in the original show makes and appearance as does Leonard Stern, writer and exec. producer of the series. The only cameo that didn’t work for me was an odd turn by Bill Murray as Agent 13 who spends his entire scene inside a tree and is desperate for attention (was Agent 13 aways like that?).

As one who has only ever caught a few episodes snippets of the show from Nick at Nite I’m sure there are a ton of geek out moments that I missed (shoe phone makes an appearance at the end). I also didn’t have much of an attachment to the series or characters and was not expecting very much from this one but in the end Carell’s turn as Maxwell Smart won me over. The film is fun, mostly solid and an excellent addition to his career, which I thought was headed downhill after last year’s output.

B

The Incredible Hulk (Review)

One can hardly blame Marvel for wanting to hit restart on the Hulk films. As one of their big 3 properties and second only in character mass appeal to Spidey, it must have been hard to stomach the fan reaction to the Ang Lee joint. I guess this one is for the fans but as a stand alone film it’s only just OK. During the opening credits you see (silently) the creation of this version of the Hulk. Interesting that despite the reset this is not an origin film and it is set 5 years after the events of the credits… which also happens to be 5 years after Eric Bana went GREEN. I’m still not sure what to make of that. But in the present day Ed Norton’s Hulk is hiding out in South America doing odd jobs, keeping a low profile and taking anger management courses. One small misstep sends William Hurt’s General Ross down Amazon way with hired gun and all around psycho Emil Blonsky (Tim Roth) in tow. Norton of course escapes but only after long foot chase and a teaser of a hulk-out. Back in the good ol’ USofA Banner has returned home to find his girl Betty Ross – daughter of the general (Liv Tyler – daughter of the rocker). They catch up but an ambush is in the works and we finally get a full on fight… one in which a slightly enhanced Blonsky is left a shattered husk. But that slight enhancement kept him alive and he juices up for fight #3 where we switch coasts (Iron Man already trashed LA) to Harlem(!) where Banner and Ross go to meet a not all there scientist type overplayed by Tim Blake Nelson. He succeeds in quashing the genetic changes of one outburst but in doing so Banner is captured. As he’s flown away Blonsky who is now totally off his rocker forces the doc to give him the Hulk treatment turning him into the Abomination and setting up the next villain in the process. And then there’s the final Showdown at the Apollo!!!

While this film doesn’t quite touch the lows of the former film, it never comes near the highs either. Lee explored the psyche of the character while Norton’s version is worried about how a lusty romp might excite him too much. Lee’s brilliant comic book editing, stunning visuals (non CG) and iconic superhero moments are all absent from this film as are the great acting abilities of Bana and Connelly. The villains though are a step up with Hurt’s no nonsense General getting a slight edge and Roth’s seething but never hammy performance blowing Nolte away. The tone of this film is more “bland damsel in distress melodrama” with pithy jokes tossed in, ya know - a superhero movie. Its also chock full of full on geek-out moments that will have the fans cheering which isn’t necessarily a bad thing.

Unfortunately, Hulk drops a month after Marvel Studios brought us the revelatory RDJ as Iron Man and this one just can’t hold a candle to that. It’s not an abomination but it ain’t nothin’ to ink home about either. If Marvel can keep all their output somewhere between this and Iron Man though, I’ll be quite happy with the master plan.

Geek Note: no need to stay for the credits – they bumped the Tony Stark cameo to just before it fades to black.

C/C+

Viva La Vida or Big Brother Is Watching You

So as a denizen of the blogosphere you already know about the "record company destroying" leak of the new set from Coldplay last week. (Legal Listen) But there is also the little business of their US tour fiasco with production delays forcing postponement by almost a month - and now the kick off is in LA? Philly deserves better. (j/k - let them work the kinks out on the left coast).

I did however win tickets to the free live show up at MSG on the 23rd (jealous?) which as of yet has not been bumped. This means it should be a nice little productionless fan/band/jam in the most famous arena in the world. When checking the inbox today I found this:

This is your order number for your pair(2) of tickets to the Free Coldplay show
at Madison Square Garden on June 23rd, 2008.

Doors are scheduled for 7:00pm. Showtime is scheduled for 8:00pm You will learn your seat locations when you receive your tickets in the mail. Tickets will be mailed via US Mail - Delivery Confirmation. Tickets will be mailed on or before June 13th, 2008. They will be mailed from Musictoday in Crozet, VA. You will receive a white bubble padded package in the mail. Be on the lookout!

You will also receive a shipping confirmation email on the day that your tickets ship. We know we've told you before, but we're going to tell you again.

DON'T SELL THESE TICKETS.

We're watching and we'll catch you. Trust us!

If you can't make it, email or call us. We'll find some other fan who
will go in your place.

Thanks again. We'll see you at the show!

Ya just have to laugh at this. Not sure who is behind the watching but i'm keeping my blinds closed till next Tuesday just in case. I don't plan on selling these but I fear they might catch me in some kind of compromising position (NSFW). Can't wait for this and the eventual "big show" when the tour stops by the Wac... wait minute - they are playing at the Wachovia center. Wachovia/WatchOvaYa... I feel like Agent Mulder, or Nic Cage in those Indy rip off movies.

Late-

Bonus MP3: Bloc Party vs. Coldplay - Hunting for Witches In My Place

The Promotion (Review)

The Promotion

“Competition in academia is so vicious because the stakes are so small.” That quote (credited to everyone from Woodrow Wilson to Henry Kissinger) pretty much sums up this film about a cut throat struggle for a corporate grocery store manager position in the Chicagoland area. Unfortunately this one should have either been a whole lot funnier or a whole lot more vicious. With a cast featuring Seann William Scott, John C. Reilly, Jenna Fischer and Fred Armisen one would expect the former and there are some really funny moments. More of the film though, feels like a first draft of a Mike White screenplay teetering on the dark comedy edge but with characters who aren’t really flawed enough to make for solid schadenfreude.

Scott is the assistant to Armisen’s manager at the outset and when a new store opens up in their chain Armisen says he’s a shoe-in. The wrench in the works come a few days later in the form of Reilly (in his lovable loser mode), another AM who has transferred from a sister company in Canada in order to try for a new life with his Scottish immigrant wife played by Lili Taylor. This makes for some truly awful accent play that seems to change from scene to scene. They both apply for the job and the rest of the film takes place as they compete for the spot. It starts out and simple competition and then things get a little nastier and the characters for frustrated at every little thing that goes wrong. The whole thing ends in a kind of bland détente that fails inspire enjoyment. Scott and his on screen fiancée Jenna Fischer though have great chemistry and it’s a shame that they don’t have more of that screen time together.

Chicago has never looked worse on film. This isn’t a criticism, there are certain parts of cities that are just not photogenic (the Philly shown in Unbreakable) and when filmed in flat lighting it does add to the drabness of the whole piece. But even the scenes downtown aren’t anything to write home about. Poster isn't bad though.

I'm not sure why they lead the trailer with one of the worst swing and a miss jokes in the film - the black apple bit. Over all this one is more rotten than fresh and I can’t recommend seeing it in the theater. A slow Saturday afternoon on cable? Sure.

C+

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (Review)

Still processing...

Didn't love it, didn't hate it. Twas a fun, serviceable summer blockbuster but lacking the charm of Ark. When Karen Allen finally appears after an hour or so it feels right again but the plot is unwieldy and really only serves to backdrop the action scenes. (Jungle chase = cool).

Ford settles into the roll much better than Willis did last year - he's not really changed which is good. LaBeouf is eh... early on but when his plot line really kicks in he shines as well. Hurt, Winstone & Broadbent are criminally underused and Blanchett is just so-so (where is the leather outfits that were promised?)

Oh, and Spielberg finally nails an ending – more than that the beginning shot is hilarious as the Paramount logo (vintage 1981) literally fades into a mole hill. Giving an initial wink to just have fun and go with it. I’ll recommend the same.

B-

Summer Gaming

The new Summer Box Office Challenge game is starting soon and runs thru Labor Day. Head over and sign up to test you skills at playing the movie market and creating the most blockbusterisious summer movie line-up possible and maybe win a prize!

Click the pic below or the banner above to take part.

The EZ1 is also running the Pick 5 and Movieline games which will start in June and If you join the boards there is a "summer survivor" lounge game starting soon as well. All there are based on your Box Office prediction prowess, take a little less time commitment (you're spening time reading this blog anyway) and you can even compete against avid player and BO pundit/film reviewer the Weekend Warrior (aka Edward Douglas) from ComingSoon.net.

Browse around and have fun!

And now... Music!

OK, enough with the movies for a bit time to drop a few new tracks as I've not done that yet this year.

Let's start with the return of N*E*R*D! The Neptune boys are back after a 4 year hiatus with their pocket protecting entourage and they have a nice funky new single that drops today. You can buy it at iTunes or if ya wish download it right there:

N*E*R*D - Everyone Nose (All the Girls Standing In the Line for the Bathroom)

Video is not yet out but you can see a sneak peek as well as some behind the scenes clips:




Catch 'em on tour at Kanye's Glow In the Dark Tour.

Next up is a triple hitter from Welsh rockers People In Planes. Out to conquer all media with the first single off their sophomore set (Due 6/24) they have tossed out a assault on your eyes, ears and index fingers. The track about suffering in silence comes with with a stylish video from the Walter Robot directing team:


Of course they are giving away the anthemic piano rocker away on their website:

People In Planes - Pretty Buildings (The b-side acoustic version is available as a 2-fer-1 deal on iTunes.)

And finally just to make sure you can't escape they've rejiggered an addictive flying game (naturally) from Net-Games with the track. Head over to play Metro.Siberia Underground: People In Planes Edition and see how far you can get. Got to past 2000 on my 3rd try.

Now, in their promotional tour they played an in-studio set in Chicago. Here is the first track from that set:

People In Planes - Mayday (Maidez) [Live in Studio at Stray Dog Recording Co. for BFN Networks Podcast]

Click here for the other full podcast episode with 2 more live tracks and interviews.

Kewl, that should keep ya busy for a bit. Enjoy!

Festival Day 7

Sorry for the delay, since last I posted there has been a wedding, a bachelor party (different grooms) and a move. This was written over the course of the two+ week break but couldn;t finalize till today.

Prelude
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4

Day 5

Day 6

Saturday 4/12

Violent Saturday
USA 1955, 90 min

I couldn’t very well start this final weekend of the festival with anything else but Violent Saturday. The film played as part of the Noir Series but it really was more a heist film than a noir. Directed by Richard Fleischer (20000 Leagues Under the Sea, Fantastic Voyage, Tora! Tora! Tora!, Compulsion) this forgotten film centers on a gang (including Lee Marvin) who make their way to a small mining town in order to rob the town bank. We see them plot their deeds and also are treated to seemingly meaningless slice of life segments from different people in the town including the peeping tom bank manager, a librarian purse-snatcher, a young girl who works in the pharmacy, a wealthy mine owning couple with marital difficulties and a family with father/son issues. As the plot unfolds, mainly in the light of day, they all become key parts along with an Amish family who lives out of town on a farm which will serve as the robber’s hideout and scene of the final climactic shootout. The patriarch of this family? None other than Mr. Ernest Borgnine!

(Opening totally over the top credit sequence)

This is a recently remastered print in brilliant De Luxe Color, but the real shine on this gem comes from the film’s snappy dialogue. The audience was left chuckling quite a few times as sly insults are were hurled amongst the various flawed characters – whether they be real city criminals or the strange small-town peccadilloed folk. The film in not available in any format currently (a VHS was made sometime in the 80s) but the print source is listed as Criterion so I’m eagerly awaiting a shiny DVD release from the boys over there. If this one comes by your local festival or retrospective theater though, get a ticket right quick, you won’t be disappointed.

B+

Son of Rambo
USA 2007, 95 min

Another Sundance hit (2007 vintage though) finally makes its way to Philadelphia accompanies by 3 grey suited security guys with night vision. A semi-autobiographical story from Garth Jennings and his Hammer & Tongs team, Son tells the story of creative but gullible Will. Living in Hertfordshire, UK (‘bout an hour north of London), he has grown up in a fundamentalist family who forbid TV & film viewing. When he sees First Blood for the first time it kicks his mind into high gear and he teams up with Lee, another outcast though in a totally different way, to create their own film in which Will is the titular son and is on a quest to spring his “father” from prison. An exotic French exchange student who has the British kids wrapped around his finger gets wind of the film and wants to play a role catapulting the boys to instant popularity and straining their relationship.

(Trailer)

This is cute, smart and has a ton of heart and should do well with audiences… IF it weren’t being released at the beginning of May. Seeing as how it garnered the highest price ever paid for a Sundance film I’m really questioning Paramount’s release strategy on this one. It screams for an August buzz garnering platform release ala Little Miss Sunshine. I do hope people will seek this one out.

A-

Soo
aka: Su
South Korea 2007, 122 min

Wow, its been a while since I’ve written anything on this and the mediocre films have rapidly left my memory. From the festival website I am reminded that this is a revenge tale about twin brothers (orphans?). We start in their childhood when one decides to rob a mobster. In chasing him down they end up catching the twin – thus the previously good twin becomes part of the criminal element while the previously bad twin becomes a cop. When they finally meet years later the criminal is now the titular legendary assassin with a price on his head but his brother is gunned down a few feet away. The twin of course assumes his identity in order to track down his killers and struggles to make people believe that he is not Soo but his brother. Once again the fault of the film is the fact that people get shot, stabbed, beaten, and even have their throats slit and yet somehow still stay alive. This comedic superhumanism really takes you out of the film. In fact up until the final (painfully elongated) showdown it’s a decent if not overly compelling yarn with good performances but the amount of blood and hobbling in the final minutes had the audience laughing at the screen.

(Trailer)

C

Nothing to Lose
aka: TBS
Netherlands 2008, 88 min

Of course films like this tend to stay with you. Nothing to Lose is a dark tale of a mentally unstable man, Johan who escapes a criminal mental institution in Holland along with a friend by kidnapping a doctor. They go on the lam and when things turn south they split up. Johan kidnaps another young girl and set out to find his mother who he hopes will prove that he did not murder his father and sister. Along the way the director’s deft hand reveals details that change your perceptions of the characters and what they may or may not have done all coming to a final chilling climax that will have you on the verge of tears.

(Trailer)

The film won the Best Picture jury prize for the film festival though it also finished pretty far down in the audience balloting and it’s not surprising why. What is surprising is that this is based on a series of real crimes that happened in the Netherlands due to a very lenient penal system. The director Pieter Kuijpers was on hand to reveal this in his Q & A after the screening. He also revealed that the film’s star Theo Maassen is actually one of the top stand-up comics in the country but that he cast him in order to throw off expectations. For his part Maassen is brilliant as the troubled and desperate Johan, the strongest single performance of the fortnight. This is not a film I’d watch over and over but is it a strong statement and a searing indictment of the Dutch prison system. Sadly one woman at the Q & A didn’t hear what he was saying stating that they were lucky to have the system that they do in comparison to that of this country.

A

Well after this I was scheduled to see an animated film called Film Noir that updates the genre in a really interesting looking style. However since an old college roommate was in town for the night I ditched that and drank the night away!!! (This lead to the missing of even more films on Sunday but more of that in the next chapter) .

Speed Racer (Review)

Here he comes, here comes Speed Racer. He’s a demon on wheels.

The all to familiar lines reinterpreted 5 or so times during this film and running during the closing credits had a dozen or so hipster kids dancing in the IMAX isles and singing along as their nostalgia trip was aided by a little Wachowski LSD. Of course like most trips you start out with awe and anticipation and close with rapture as the destination finally comes into view 2.25 hrs later but there sure are some stretches in the middle when you’re about to fall asleep.

Listen to the classic theme

But let’s gush for just a bit. I spent the first 20 minutes of this film totally slack-jawed by the candy colored eye feast that sat before me. A solitary Speed sits in the locker room then cut to the track and real life in cartoon motion begins. The film flits between several differing timepoints in an ADD firestorm of editing techniques that would leave Michael Bay speechless. Collage, CG, 2-D, rotoscoping, wipes, slo-mo, ect. The Wachowski’s throw a kitchen sink of fun at you in all colors of the rainbow. Oh and the sound, much like a race track wipes from side to side along with the edits. Finally things settle down and we start to follow a single plot line. Unfortunately this is where the film get’s mired in its own story. The whole thing deflates to the kind of long windedness that had so many pissed at the Matrix sequels and it lasts for a good hour until we finally se a second race. For some reason the Ws like their baddie’s talkative which kinda kills their menacing powers. Roger Allam hams it up the way the villain in a summertime kid’s flick should but they have him saying too much and the main crux of the story he tells Speed which partially motivates him the rest of the film rings hollow especially as it feels like it is not justifiably paid off with comeuppance for all involved. I think the film would’ve moved along much better if this thread was totally abandoned. To add some action in this wasteland they dream up an imaginary fight that Spritle and Chim-Chim have with a couple villains on TV which really feels out of place but does show their effort in bringing Manga style animation to an unanimated feature. One of the most interesting things is how they incorporate Manga backgrounds and video game concepts. At one point while Speed is flying through a track he is remembering a record his brother previously set – they show this via a shadow car that can be seen in many racing games that shows where you are in comparison to a previous time and it’s a fantastic lift.

(Watch the first 7 minutes of the film)


Of course you gotta have a big finale – and we get 2!!! There is a penultimate multi-day rally race with a big ninja fight in the middle that really gets things going again and then the final race begins. Just when you don’t think there are any visual tricks left that could impress you Speed flies down the track at colors mix, characters collage and action blends into an orgasmic explosion that just has to be seen… then Speed drinks milk.

For their part the cast is decent in their intentionally over the top roles. Sarandon is completely wasted and Hirsch starts off pretty good but eventually falls as I feared he would in to uber-earnest territory which mirrors the tone of the film which starts out a family flick but then has some cursing (actual and bleeped) in the last 30 minutes or so which slightly hit the wrong note. Despite that dragging middle and unevenness of the whole thing this is really something that has to be seen on the big screen – preferably the biggest one available… IMAX!

B/B-

Festival Day 6

Prelude
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4

Day 5

Friday 4/11

Help Me Eros
aka: Bangbang wo aishen
Taiwan 2007, 103 min

Two of the most challenging films of the festival came on Friday night. The first, Help Me Eros is a Taiwanese take on the Contemplative Cinema of Béla Tarr, Theo Angelopoulos, current period Van Sant, ect. The films are meant to give you time to process and read what you may into them while the film is running as well as long after. But the problem with contemplative cinema is that it is very culture specific and the meditations and queues that are there to pick up are often lost on people who don’t know that culture and thus the contemplative aspects are seen more as space in which to fall asleep. This neon poem to Taipei is filled with loneliness and sadness and life that is soulless but plot queues, while interesting are alien to me.
The plot that the film floats about involves and man who has lost millions and is now holding onto the last vestiges of his previous life – an ultra modern home atop a sweet shop and a mighty impressive pot plant. Having also lost all his friends he pawns off pieces of his life to buy water and sweets at one of the most bizarre establishments I’ve ever seen – a drive though neon candy shop with a stripper poll and girls in skimpy outfits. He falls for one of 3 girls working there but ends up getting high and fornicating with all of them… in very visually memorable ways. His love interest, obviously pissed, destroys the plant and his depression spirals further out of control to the point that he buys 50 thousand dollars worth of lottery tickets. In the final scene he disappears but bills rain down from his window.

Its brilliant looks may entice some while the poetic meditations on life will suit others and some may put up with it to see the more titillating aspects of the film but on the whole this is a very art-house film. If you appreciate any of the directors mentioned above though seek this one out.

A-

Defecit
aka: Déficit
Mexico 2007, 75 min

This is Gael García Bernal’s directorial debut and its not that interesting to tell the truth. Bernal plays the lead Christobal, the teenage scion of an upper-class Mexican family. He is down at the family’s vacation house with his friends for a weekend and there are a bunch of class issues and drugs and jealousy and swimming and daddy hating and barbecue. It’s fairly melodramatic and very well trodden territory (you can actually see people coming of age!) but at least it’s also short and well acted.

C+

Far North
Great Britain, France 2007, 89 min

The final film of the night was to be Irina Palm but the print was apparently lost in transit (I’m assuming USAir was to blame). Instead it was replaced with this film directed by Asif Kapadia (The Warrior, The Return) and staring Michelle Yeoh and Sean Bean. The title refers to the lands above the Russian Arctic Circle for which special benefits are given to those who chose to work there. Yeoh plays a native woman whose village was attacked by some of these men. She flees for parts even farther north with the only other surviving member, an infant child. Together they live as survivalists in the harsh climate avoiding all human contact. When Yeoh discovers a man come down from a glacier (Bean) her nurturing instincts get the better of him and she brings him into their camp and nurses him back to health. The now grown infant and adopted daughter falls for him and they make plans to leave all leading to an unexpected showdown that will leave you speechless.

Part horror film, part psycho-drama and part travelogue with hints of an environmental message the scenery is the real star of this film reflecting the seeming openness but hidden dangers in the characters and well as their relative stoic silence. Yeoh gives one of her most powerful performances to date as the damaged, protective survivalist who becomes jealous of her ward and the new interloper. Much like Mother Nature when something new emerges to throws off the balance she moves to bring things back to a natural equilibrium.

B

Festival Day 5

Prelude
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4

Thursday 4/10

The End
Great Britain 2008, 74 min

Thursday was doc day at the festival with the only 2 docs on my list playing at opposite ends of the city. Interestingly enough, I started with The End. This is a doc about the life and death of London’s notorious East End as told by the men who lived and “worked” there. The filmmaker is the daughter of one of the leading criminal entrepreneurs. After realizing that he life was so different from most other peoples she decided to take stock by shooting this film (this is based on the Q & A after, she isn’t a character in the film) and was able to get privileged access to these usually tight lipped men. The film is shot in grainy black and white which adds to the chilling effect of the conversations with these (current and) former cockney gangsters and the music fits the mood perfectly as well with a DJ Shadow style melancholy [stream]. From their conversations you learn that their story is much like that of any community with a thriving organized criminal element: working class upbringing, family loyalty, ethical codes, being there for your mates, ect. These are tough guys but they are also family men and they all share a sense of loss because this neighborhood and community no longer exists. 2/3 of the way through the film one of them takes a walk through the current East End which has turned into an open air bazaar as peoples from the middle-east and the Indian subcontinent have replaced the white population. There is a sense of loss but its really not racially motivated as one might think but it’s the idea that the life that these men knew and grew up in is now gone forever and that they are really the last cockney gangsters that will ever be. Most have moved on to decent sized estates outside the city (thanks to ill-gotten gains with one man proclaiming "Crime Pays!" while showing off his posh digs) while a few others are actually hiding out from authorities. This film serves as an outstanding document of a culture that has since passed, for better or worse, from the land. Oh and the strong accents are thankfully subtitled.

There was a Q & A with the director and producer of the film – unfortunately the first for me of the entire festival – which was very enlightening. The film stands on its own but some of the details and back story of these characters was nicely fleshed out afterward. I hope they do a commentary track if this eventually gets a dvd release.

A-

Milk In the Land, Ballad of an American Drink
USA 2007, 90 min

Thankfully the previous film was a scant 74 minutes which left ample time even with a Q & A to get down to Old City for the start of the next film, a startling documentary on the history of Milk in America. The filmmakers obviously have an agenda as this film while not explicitly anti-milk (though it talks with people that are) is definitely anti-corporate dairy farming. The film starts detailing the history of the American dairy industry – cows were kept in New York City as a way of disposing of left over grain from whiskey distilling so people could get swill milk year round… though it killed quite a few people. It goes through the growth of the industry as a replacement for breast milk that was not being produced by middle class urban dwelling women (corsets), the breeding of cows that would produce year round and in great quantities and how the Dairy Lobby grew to national importance and scandal under the Nixon administration. They also visit a family farmer in Wisconsin who advocates drinking raw milk over the pasteurized store bought version. Surprisingly little is mentioned about rBGH or Monsanto.

Frankly looking at all that sloshing chalky liquid made me a little queasy and outside of cereal and coffee I rarely drink the stuff. However, I found many parts of the film fascinating especially where it digresses into the effect this drink has had on American culture from the religious to the hobbyists and how these people in turn affected its pervasive spread to our refrigerators and tables.

B+

Pistoleros
Denmark 2007, 90 min

The final film of the night was this Robert Rodriguez/Guy Richie inspired genre flick from Denmark. I should’ve caught another doc. The story within a story within a story is that some film school kids are making a fiction piece based on the legend of a heist gone awry so they meet a seedy character in a bar who starts telling the yarn. At some point the party is crashed by another man with a story to tell and some people in the story also… well you get it. The big question is “where’s the money?” and the resolution to this question contradicts everything that transpired in the 85 minutes of set up. Also people get shot, beat with pipes, kicked in the ribs thrown through hard objects and just keep on fighting. Most of the characters are just annoying and some do things in back to back scenes that completely contradict each other. And unlike either of the two that this movie cribs from the director, Shaky González, has an awesome name but no visual flare. The look is ugly, under lit at night and flat during the day. The only interesting thing about this is the fact that the lead actor looks exactly like David Beckham so when he gets the crap beaten out of him it’s kinda funny. Worst film of the fest. (Apparently there is an epilogue after the closing credits that explain some things - I didn't know this and didn't stick around at the time)

D